An art teacher addicted to silicone guns, a mother who throws out everyone else’s belongings, and a father who is extremely pessimistic and grumpy.
The regular panel members: Jung Chan Woo, Choi Tae Joon, Shin Dong Yeon, Lee Young Ja, and Kim Tae Gyun
These are the problems on this episode of Hello Counsellor, (KBS) the talk show that allows members of the public to discuss their problems on TV! (See here for an introduction to the format of Hello Counsellor)
This week’s guest counsellors were K-pop singer Kim Tae Woo lead vocalist of boyband g.o.d., celebrity Kim Jeong Min apparently famous for having a ‘hot body’, and singer-rapper Henry.
PROBLEM 1 얿는 집안 NO HOMELIFE
A daughter in her twenties who lives at home with her parents is upset because her mum keeps throwing all her stuff away! Once her mum threw all her makeup out. So the daughter cancelled her date with her boyfriend because she didn’t want to turn up with no makeup on. (Chan Woo looks more shocked that she won’t go out without makeup on and asks her about her ‘lack of confidence…’)
Another time she couldn’t find the new clothes she had bought because her mum had thrown them away too! Other accessories like sunglasses and even jewellery (including the jewellery box) met the same fate. Her mum even got rid of a computer. And perfectly good food is taken out of the fridge and thrown away – there are three fridges in their home but Mum likes it when they are all empty!
But the worst incident in the daughter’s memory was when she saved up her pocket money as a child and bought a bicycle for 400,000 won but when they moved house her mum threw the bike out…
the panel listen to the son’s story on Hello Counsellor KBS2 episode 332
The celebrity panel seem shocked at the seemingly thoughtlessness of the mother and they try to find a way to sympathise with her. Why did she throw out the makeup? Was it because it was old or almost empty?
No it was new and hardly used.
OK, was it because she didn’t want her daughter to go out?
No, she didn’t care if she went out or not.
OK, did the same thing happen to her as a child? Did her mum throw away her things?
No, that never happened to her.
Right, well did she throw her own things out too? Perhaps she has some kind of decluttering addiction.
No, that’s not it either. She has no problem keeping her own belongings and the wardrobes are full of her clothes. In fact, if she likes something, she’ll simply take it – she took her daughter’s ring because she liked it herself.
So the panel (and audience) seem baffled by her attitude as there seems to be no explanation except that the mum is not only selfish but also heartless – she doesn’t just chuck out clothes and accessories, but also things that have sentimental value. She ripped up a letter her daughter had received from a friend because she had ‘already read it so it was just scrap paper’ and threw out a photo album given to her son by his girlfriend when he was in the army!
mother and son on Hello Counsellor episode 332 KBS2
The son left home because he couldn’t cope with his mother’s behaviour. Not only did she throw out his stuff (including new jeans that he had just bought for 200,000 won) but she constantly reorganised and cleaned the home on a DAILY basis making HIM shift furniture around.
He added that his mum never praised him or gave any words of encouragement. After he left home his mother didn’t contact him at all to see how he was doing! She said she didn’t care if the daughter moved out too.
The mum remains stoic and unrepentant throughout the show but finally shows some emotion when it’s suggested that she might regret her behaviour when she gets older and her children might not want anything to do with her.
the studio audience gets ready to vote
The celebrity guests all vote that this is DEFINITELY a problem. The studio audience agrees with them and they get 155 votes. A very high score.
Wow, what is going on with the mum? She doesn’t seem to think that her children have any rights at all! Her coldness is frightening. When she is accused of being selfish she defends herself saying she is entitled to throw anything away because she’s the boss and it’s her home. Her kids’ things are HER things! The expressions on her children’s faces say it all. They seem so desperate for affection too.
In the end the mum agrees that she will consult with her daughter next time before she throws something out, but will she really?…
PROBLEM TWO 그녀를 조심해 BEWARE OF THAT GIRL!
This is an eccentric one…
A young woman is worried that her friend is addicted to SILICONE GUNS! She takes a gun in her handbag everywhere she goes and is always looking for cracks in walls and window sills etc to seal up. (yes, you read that right)
Once she even missed a bus because she saw a window that needed sealing and couldn’t leave it alone. She sent her friend on ahead saying she would catch a later bus after she sealed the crack up!
When they go to a cafe her friend is not focused on their conversation but rather looking around for places to use her gun. She even takes the gun with her on dates and to formal functions like weddings. She tried to take the gun and a supply of silicone tubes with her in her hand luggage when she went on holiday to Japan with her friends but was not allowed to take it on the plane. This ruined the holiday for her and she was miserable the whole time.
‘silicone gun addict’
The ‘silicone gun addict’ is an art teacher in a hagwon and first got into silicone guns a few years ago when some remodelling was done on her home. She tried to use the gun and found it very therapeutic. Now she gets through 40 tubes of silicone a month and uses a gun every day. She shows the audience three different guns – an orange one, a green one, and a black one. The green one is called ‘bonjour!’ (because her friend gave it to her as a souvenir from France…)
Henry joins in to play with the guns
But she doesn’t always ask the owner’s permission to use her gun on their property! And Chan Woo points out that doing anything to buildings without permission could lead to being charged with CRIMINAL DAMAGE. The teacher looks mortified at this and says she had no idea that what she was doing was illegal! She just wants to rid the world of cracks in walls!
How to use a silicone gun like a pro
She demonstrates how to use the gun and all the celebrities have a go too. (it does look quite therapeutic actually) She’s really good at sealing up the cracks smoothly and evenly leaving no air holes. This segment of the show ends with her showing the audience her silicone gun dance! ha ha clips from the show here
silicone gun dance
None of the panel said this was a real problem. And the teacher only got 56 votes from the audience.
Oh I liked this one. After the serious first problem of the show this is a light interlude. The teacher has such a fun and quirky personality. Now she’s thinking about working with silicone guns in some kind of Art project! The only issue is that her friend said that the smell from the silicone gives her a headache. So are the fumes bad for her health?
PROBLEM 3 행복하고싶어요 I WANT TO BE HAPPY
a daughter who can’t even make eye contact with her dad
Here’s a sad one to finish …
The daughter in her 20s is unhappy because of her father’s character. He’s always saying negative stuff like ‘what’s the point of living?‘ And when his wife complains about his dark attitude he’ll say, ‘I know I make your life miserable. I’ll grant you a divorce.‘
He also gets angry easily. At home he swears at TV programmes that annoy him. Once in a car park he got so mad that he spat at another car. But then the other car owner came back and they got into an argument! He also smokes, and drinks too much. When he drinks he gets angry and scary and ‘turns into the hulk‘. His daughter would like him to compliment her sometimes but all he does is complain.
Mother sits glumly as Father explains his side of the story
The father reveals his many frustrations. He had to leave school after primary school and became a carpenter. He’s 68 now but still can’t retire for financial reasons despite having health issues – he has prostrate trouble and had cataract surgery.
He’s not satisfied with anything. He compares his own family circumstances with the neighbours and is disappointed in his daughter and his wife. At first he makes out that he is attentive to his wife but then admits that he often forgets her birthday too…
panelists Jung Chan Woo, Lee Young Ja, and Henry listen to the story
All the guests agree that this really is a problem and the family gets 142 votes. This is a ‘good’ score but the first family got more votes with 155 votes and so win this week’s prize.
I think there are many men like this in his generation. They feel some ‘han’ disappointment about their lives and the lack of opportunities that they had. Perhaps he wanted to go on with his education but his family’s financial situation wouldn’t allow it. He admits that his behaviour is also influenced by his own father who never said a kind word either!
The saddest part of this story though is the expressions on the faces of his daughter and mother. They look emotionally beaten down. The daughter doesn’t make eye contact with her father AT ALL when he’s speaking. The panel try in vain to get something positive out of this story. But it feels like nothing is going to change in this family. I don’t see a happy family fishing trip in the near future. Too sad. I think I’ll read the silicone story again to cheer myself up.